You Will Miss Even the Sleepless Nights Someday

“How was your night last night?”

If you’re in the season of waking up every couple of hours with a baby, that question can feel loaded. Maybe your baby woke up crying three times. Maybe they only settle when you hold them. Maybe you’re exhausted and wondering how long this phase is going to last.

When you’re in the middle of sleep deprivation, it can feel endless.

Here’s what’s important to know: it won’t last forever. And one day, surprisingly, you may even miss parts of it.

When the Nights Feel Never-Ending

There was a two-year stretch in our family where we had a couple of foster babies in a row who struggled with sleep and fussiness.

I’m a lighter sleeper than my wife, so I was usually the one getting up in the middle of the night to feed them, rock them, and help them settle back down.

At the time, waking up every few hours felt like a burden that would never go away.

If you’re in that season now, you probably understand that feeling. The nights blur together. You’re tired during the day. You start measuring time in naps, feedings, and wake-ups instead of weeks and months.

And when you’re exhausted, it’s easy to think:
“Will this ever get better?”

Here’s What I Remember Most

What surprises me now is not how hard those nights were.

It’s how short they were.

In some ways, time felt frozen during those sleepless stretches. But when I look back now, the strongest memories are not frustration or exhaustion.

I remember closeness.

I remember holding a baby in a dark room while the house was quiet. I remember the feeling of being needed. I remember the connection that formed during those long nights.

And that connection lasts.

When I tell my daughter stories about what she was like as a baby, she lights up. She takes pride in being part of our family story. The love and trust built in those ordinary moments continues to show up years later in ways I never expected.

That doesn’t mean you have to enjoy every sleepless night.

You don’t need to pretend exhaustion is magical.

But sometimes it helps to remember that these difficult moments are also deeply human ones. You are building relationship and security, even when it just feels tiring.

Time Moves Faster Than You Think

Our youngest is now 8 years old. Next year, she’ll be too old to attend the school where my wife works. Our 12-year-old is only a few years away from driving and high school graduation.

It feels like such a short time since ago they were so incredibly small.

When you have a baby, the days can feel incredibly long. But the years move unbelievably fast.

One day your baby will sleep through the night consistently.
One day they won’t need to be rocked.
One day they won’t fit on your chest anymore.

And someday, you may find yourself wishing you could go back for just one more middle-of-the-night cuddle.

Here’s What’s Going On

If you’re overwhelmed by broken sleep right now, that doesn’t mean you’re failing.

Babies wake frequently for many reasons:

• Hunger
• Comfort
• Immature sleep patterns
• Growth and development
• Illness or teething
• Needing connection and regulation

Frequent waking is extremely common in infancy, even though it can feel isolating when you’re living through it.

This season is temporary, even if it doesn’t feel temporary today.

Practical Takeaways for Exhausted Parents

If you’re struggling through sleepless nights right now, here are a few things worth remembering:

• You do not have to love every moment to value this season later.
• Exhaustion can coexist with deep connection.
• Your baby is not “giving you a hard time.” They are having a hard time.
• Small moments of comfort and consistency matter.
• Accepting help when possible is healthy, not weak.
• It’s okay to simply survive some seasons of parenting.

Sometimes the goal is not mastering the perfect sleep routine.

Sometimes the goal is just getting through this week with gentleness toward yourself and your baby.

FAQ

Is it normal for babies to wake up often at night?

Yes. Frequent night waking is very common during infancy, especially in the first year. Babies wake for feeding, comfort, development, and regulation. While every baby is different, disrupted sleep is a normal part of early parenting for many families.

However, if you have concerns about it, please check in with your pediatrician.